06 May 2010

If I Had an Older Brother

I am re-posting this for the photo challenge over at A Sorta Fairytale.  These below are some of life's most precious moments to me.

Even before I was pregnant, I was wishing for our first child to be a boy –not because of the Chinese need to have a son to continue the family name, –but simply because in case I’d have a daughter one day, she’d have an older brother. I somehow had this romantic idea about older brothers doting on, being protective of, and looking out for their younger sisters. Then we had Josh. Two years later came Zoë. My prayers were answered.

From the very beginning, even before Josh actually set eyes on Zoë, when he first saw Zoë’s picture on Chris’ phone* , Josh surprised us by how big his heart was. He said to the picture on the phone, “Hi, Zoë. Pleased to meet you.” At 27 months. When Chris told me that the following day when he went back to the hospital, I just about melted.

Josh has been a very good big brother to Zoë. Reading to her…

As early as when he was only 2.5 years old himself

Even now...


Playing with her…


When Josh was in K1 (during Zoë’s first year), most of the drawings and entries in his school journal (written down by his teacher/ as narrated by Josh) were about “my sister Zoë.”

When Zoë visits his school, he would take Zoë by the hand and show her around, proudly introducing her to his teachers, his classmates, his classmates’ parents, –everybody! –telling them, “This is Zoë. She’s my sister.”


Lately, I see more of Josh’s protectiveness and thoughtfulness come into play. There was one kid in the playground who was laughing at Zoë; I can’t remember over what. Before I could even say anything, Josh told him, “Don’t do that. She’s my sister.”


Josh would hold on fast to Zoë’s hand when the elevator door opens to make sure that Zoë doesn’t go in alone (which had happened once before!).


When we’d go out without Zoë and somebody gives Josh something – a balloon, a lollipop, –without prompting from us, he would ask for another one for his sister.


It’s not all peaches and cream all the time, though. Josh teases Zoë until she cries. Zoë almost always wants whatever it is that Josh has at the moment. She knocks down towers that Josh has painstakingly built. She scribbles over Josh’s precious drawings. Josh gets mad and tells her, “I don’t like you, Zoë!” Sometimes in his frustration, he hurts Zoë. She fights back. And I’ll have two crying children on my hands. But once they’ve calmed down, apologized, and kissed and hugged each other, they’re back at being partners-in-mischief. They play pretty well together. Most of the time.


Josh is not a snuggly bunny like Zoë, but he has his own special brand of sweetness. And boy, the sweet things he does are just that much sweeter when he does them. Remember how much he loves me? And how he cried when he thought Zoë was running away to China?
If I could have an older brother, I would want one just like Josh.

If you could choose a sibling, would you want a brother or a sister, older or younger?


*Zoë and I didn’t come home from the hospital until after Day 3 and Josh was not allowed to visit (hospital rules for children under 12).


Nezzy said...

I always wanted a big brother instead I got a baby sister almost ten years younger. She was like a livin' day to take care of but in my heart I've always longed for a big brother. I got him when I married my hubby plus a little bro to boot. Heeehehehe!

God bless and have a wonderfully fun day!!!

Kasie said...

aww. what a sweet post.
I have a brother who is about 2 years younger than me. We used to fight so bad when we were younger. We get a long pretty good now. I always wanted an OLDER brother though. Our dad wasn't in the picture so that security would have been nice. Instead I got a little brother who liked to irritate me badly :) o'well. :)

so sweet that they get along so well. cute pics

Sarah at The Stroller Ballet said...

So adorable! I've said it before, but your kids are beautiful! I have a brother and a sister. Both younger. I always wondered what it would be like to have an older sibling, though!

Anita said...

The video almost made me want another baby...I said ALMOST. :)

I have an older brother - only by 20 months. I can only remember a couple times when he was protective of me. Mostly, we were more like twins...independent, but inside, we always knew we had each other, and still do.

RoseBelle said...

Josh will be a great brother. He already exhibits that tenderness and love towards his sister. I think having an elder brother is better and I sometimes thought how great it would be if I was not the eldest but I had a elder brother.

Oh guess what? Something just caught my attention as I'm reading Zoe's name. I've always thought it's Zoey, but the two dots above the e, is it more like the Cantonese Zo-yi? If so, my eldest daughter's Chinese name is also Zo-yi.

Lindy said...

I love that he holds her hand at the elevators - that he remembers she has gone by herself before.

I have 2 sisters so I've never experienced what it's like to have a brother.

Alicia said...

That is just so precious!!!!!!!! I love that he is protective of her! My kids are like that with each other too. Although, you wouldn't think so when they fight..LOL!

I only have an older sister, so I always hoped for a younger brother!

Aunt LoLo said...

So, so sweet.

And I have an older sister, two younger brothers, and a baby sister. I wouldn't have it any other way. ;-)

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

I got what I wanted for sure, a twin sister! I did want a big brother too but since that never happened my sis and I stuck up for each other.

I love the relationship that exists between Josh and Zoe. He will always be there for her. The good thing is that she knows it too.

Veronica Lee said...

I come from a family of 3 girls! My cousins are like my brothers.

Way to go, Josh! You're a terrific brother.

paige said...

I absolutely love this post. How sweet! I hope my kids turn out like this. Those photos are really wonderful!
Both my parents had lots of siblings - my mom was the middle child of 9. I love their relationships. I wish I had 8 siblings like her - both brothers and sisters, older and younger!

ModernMom said...

They are too cute together!
I have a younger sister and am blessed as an adult to be able to count her as my closest friends. She knows my secrets and I know hers. We look out for each other and have childjhood memories that we cherish...thanks to a brillant set of parents. I hope my two girls feel the same way when they grow up!

Wanda said...

Wow, we can see just how loving and protective he is of Zoe. And how much she adores her big brother. Melts my heart!

Ash said...

awww your kids are sooo cute!! looking at the pics and reading your post, i want to have a baby sis for my bubba boy. :D

Dandy said...

I soooo needed this today.

Tezzie said...

Ok...heart strings officially tugged!

I'm with you on the whole big brother issue...I always wanted one myself, and also had a wish that my kids would come in that order as well. Unfortunately, that big brother sweetness/protectiveness/etc towards his little sister hasn't made an appearance yet between Boy and Munchkin...I guess there's still hope for the future! ;D

elaine said...

Such a great sibling relationship (I am envious :-) ). Cara is not liking the fact that she is no longer the baby in the family. We have been talking to her, getting her prepped and all but she is insisting she does not want to be the big sister. We are not pushing things too much but we are hoping things will get better when baby pops out next month.

Organic Motherhood with Cool Whip said...

Awwwww...sweetest post ever. Isn't it wonderful how they love and protect each other. When my son gets a treat from school and saves half for his little brother, it just makes my heart melt. Your kids are so wonderful!!! XOXOX

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